Bad Spring Break Stories

Jimmy found himself handcuffed to a table in the lobby of a bustling Daytona Beach hotel with one of those goofy baseball caps that holds two cans of beer with straws from the cans to your mouth askew on his head.

Hey, it’s pretty easy to get giddy while planning your Spring Break trip because those plans are always filled with an exciting list of stuff to do. However, in all that planning, and discussions about who’s going to drive, where you’re going to stay, what beach are you going to chill at and on and on, there’s never a hint of the embarrassing things that may occur.  Why, well… because those things aren’t planned.

Now, as you’re making your 2019 Spring Break plans, let’s add a new column to your list and call it the “this ain’t gonna be me” column.

Back to Jimmy… A couple cops, who were trying to be gracious, handcuffed Jimmy to the table to scare and embarrass him for a bit instead of giving him an MIP. However, they got called away for an emergency. For over an hour with countless gawkers checking him out, Jimmy just stood there, quickly sobering up with every picture taken.

So, we now have your first item in the “this ain’t gonna be me” column: don’t drink under age.

Here’s the next item on your list: no tattoos. A group of guys spring breaking in Amsterdam visited the Heineken museum and thought it’d be a good idea to all get matching Heineken logo tattoos. Each bud now has matching life-long red star on their ankles. Stylish.

Ok, here’s the last item to add to your planning list. A guy named Rich had a plan for his spring break: swim with the dolphins. Rich made it happen and found himself holding the fin of a dolphin while it pulled him through the pool as his friends and other partiers looked on. The awesomeness of being pulled by a dolphin increased as the dolphin picked up speed…. until the speed exceeded the strength of his shorts. Needless to say, Rich would add this item to his list – wear underwear.

Have fun. Make a “this ain’t gonna be me” list.

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